Wednesday 09 September 2009

This season has been an excellent one for the Harpenden Praetorians, who saw somewhat of a resurgence at the beginning of the year.

The most satisfying thing about this season has been the growing of the Praetorian group, with a total of circa. 25 people travelling to both Kinsale and Newquay.

We are in a strong position, with a good player base, good supporting base and are fully intending to build on this season and expand our tournament participation next year.

Of course, there was some rugby played this year! The first tournament involved a short flight to Kinsale, Cork with a travelling group of around 24 as well as a straggler that we picked up on the way. Although we didn’t progress past the quarter finals due to the excellent Beerbarians beating us 19-14, a lot of attractive rugby was played, lots of tries were scored and as a first outing it was a relative success.

Honourable mentions must go to Charlie Pattison, Harpenden’s answer to Usain Bolt, our playmaker Jonny Macdonald and the never say die attitudes of both Andrew Read and Jack Cornthwaite who all put in excellent performances. The two non Harpenden boys Ollie Bache and Taif al Delamie were welcome additions to the squad and are now firmly considered Praetorians (rumour has it Taif has even got a scorpion tattoo in an intimate area of his body, Stitch apparently noticed it whilst watching Taif sleep).

The après rugby scene was excellent in Ireland and although many moaned about the fact a pint was a fiver, that didn’t stop it being drunk!! Notable events in Ireland include the disagreement at the chip shop, Taif constantly throwing up, Will Peck destroying himself, PAT COLLINS, Moth Girl, Gypsies, Glyn’s quality fashion sense, The Tent of Sin, Trumpy going to bed at 8 p.m., Karl’s interesting take on beach wear, that beach wear getting some action later and Kearnsy dropping off his lady friend on the bus on the way to the airport.

All these, plus a wee bit of rugby, made this an excellent trip and there are already plans to return in 2010, if the relevant authorities allow us!

The second tournament of the year was the Hertfordshire County 7s held by our friends the Old Albanians, who we ‘drew’ in the first round. The game was a very tense affair, with massive hits going in from both sides but the OA’s prevailed and won 24-12.

This meant Praetorians entered the Shield competition and swiftly dispatched of Barnet Saracens Elizabethans and St Albans (50-0, cracking game of 7s to watch) to set up a final against Welwyn. It was to be the Praetorians day with a 32-5 win and the Praetorians first bit of silverware. Again, notable mentions to the speedsters Muskett and Charlie, the wizened old head Mazza and the young’uns of John Collins and Jimmy Speirs, who went on to win the County 15s cup later that day.

Events that made the 7s were Stitch’s excellent conversion attempts, Tom Evans hit on a Barnet player, Jonny Macdonald giggling whilst scoring and beating St Albans 50-0 in the semi final. The team were content with winning the Plate but disappointed it wasn’t the Cup and fully intend to rectify this next year.

A trip to Newquay in July was the third competition entered by the Praetorians and hopes were high for a great weekend, which even the weather couldn’t dampen. The Praetorians welcomed another Arabian Gulf player to the fold in the shape of Josh ‘Bear’ Sherrin who quickly endeared himself to the group through his drinking, rugby and likeness to a bear.

The Friday and Saturday were both spent drinking copious amounts of alcohol, all good preparation for the rugby on the Sunday. Notable performances from Josh, Ready, Jonny Mac and again the sprint partnership of Muskett and Charlie (got to love those rolling subs!) helped the Praetorians to sweep away all teams in their way as they clinched the Presidents Cup with a 42-12 win over Huddersfield.

Memories taken from this trip include Cornish pasties, beer, funnels, Thai Whisky, Taif throwing up again, Josh making such a big hit on a Newquay Colt that he knocked himself out, Brownies, Dan Tennant being drunk before the sun rose, Sean ‘Yoda’ Hurley flying over from Dubai and Taif losing his bag, Glyn getting assaulted, Glyn blocking Joe’s card, Danny T and Muskett getting started on by some kids, having ‘loadsa money’, school discos, dogs getting involved with the game and Andrew Read’s exceptional tent erecting skills.

Overall, the Praetorians were very happy with their victory, especially considering the terrible state most were in on that Sunday morning, and hope to return to defend their trophy next year.

The final tournament of the year was the home one of Harpenden National Pub 7s held on the August Bank Holiday. The Praetorians were in a very tough group that included the International Marauders (most of the British Army team in it), Samurai Barracudas and Kamikaze.

Whilst they fought valiantly and almost caused an upset by beating Kamikaze, unfortunately the Praetorians lost all 3 games and so the season ended on a little of an anticlimax. It was swiftly forgotten in the bar though as talk moved onto the next 7s season.

And so there ends a highly successful season for the Praetorians, if I have missed any stories or scorelines it is not intentional, it is because I was rarely sober! Onwards and upwards go the Harpenden Praetorians.

Strength and Honour.

Awards

Player of the Year: Jonny Macdonald – was a great year from the play maker, who nearly swept the board with nominations. Big things expected next year... if his groin gets sorted!

Tourist of the Year: Will Peck – what is there to say about this man? The image of him literally owning the Tent in Kinsale I think will live on with most people, as will his love for the funnel. Great tourist.

Boozer of the Year: James Macdonald – making it 2 awards to the Macdonald Clan makes me quite proud... especially as I cannot remember anything of the year! Apparently Captain Morgan’s and Sam Sung Whisky was involved along the way...

Newcomer of the Year: Taif Delamie –the Irish Arab was an accepted member of the group before meeting everyone through his excellent email chat and putting down of Glyn. An excellent addition to the fold, he missed only one tournament all year and is sure to become a stalwart of the team.

Story/Memory of the Year: This was possibly the closest call of the awards, with Glyn’s rape, Moth Girl and ‘the fight’ outside the fish and chip shop all being nominated a few times. However, it seems the lasting memory for most of us (excluding Will who cannot remember it) is the Tent of Sin... long arming, Galway Girl, €4.70 a pint, Tom Evans using any excuse to get his top off, the first funnelling session, Flash Gordon, Will getting chucked out and so much more. That will live with me for a bloody long time!

Match of the Season: Most people agreed it was in Newquay, either the quarter finals against the Flair Bears where we turned up having not warmed up and smashed them; the semi-final against the Newquay Colts which was a ferocious game with the memorable moment being Bear eating someone and knocking himself out; or the Newquay Final where we suddenly realised we could win the whole thing and proceeded to completely demolish Huddersfield 42-12, thus winning the tournament. However, the most votes went to the semi final at Newquay, it had everything to be fair and they were an excellent team. Plus it’s always nice to beat a team on their own turf!!

The final award was for long arming or funnel... and this was actually almost a dead heat... but by one vote, the long arming won. 2 great memories provided by both these methods of drinking: as mentioned previously, the Tent of Sin for the long arming, and the campsite on the first day in Newquay for the funnel. We certainly know how to make an impression.

Praetorian players this year: 1. Andrew Read 2. Simon Payne 3. Karl Wilkinson 4. Jack Cornthwaite 5. Ollie Bache 6. Taif Delamie 7. Charlie Pattison 8. Jonny Macdonald 9. Tom Evans 10. Josh Sherrin 11. Joe Tennant 12. Tom Muskett 13. Alan Barton 14. Jon Arrowsmith 15. Nick Stevens 16. John Collins 17. Jim Speirs 18. Jon Barton

Praetorian supporters this year: ... too many to mention!

Tournaments won: County Plate and Newquay Presidents Cup